The week that was not

Comfortable. The week that wasn't comfortable. I'm not sure this week justifies an update. However, in the hope it provides some consistency I thought I'd talk about the post marathon week. To avoid sounding like a bad Craig David parody I'll summarise rather than take it day by day. Go on, you know the song.

I had realised that I would be 'a bit sore' in the days immediately after the race. This, was an understatement. I spent the next day unable to stand without first making sure it was absolutely needed.

Need to eat? Na, not yet.
Need to pee? I can hold it, I am a nurse after all.
Need to... Yep. Better get up, I'll get some food after.

This does however teach you to be economical with tasks. As for walking, I initially thought I'd cracked it by getting some momentum together and simply trying not to fall over at corners. However memories of the last few miles of Loch Ness were soon brought back as I was past by an old man with a cap and a stick. To the elderly man with a cap and a stick. I salute you. I should have worn my medal, that would have shown him.

Unsure of the best way to resolve these pains I had booked in for a sports massage. Now to qualify this I must first tell you that I don't believe in any complimentary or alternative medicines and I have a severe dislike for pseudo science. I am a rationalist. I was however, desperate.

 Atheists and lifeboats spring to mind.

I also become awkward when ordering a coffee, for fear of being misrepresented. So I was very nervous going into the massage. Half worried I'd be expected to do some chanting, be touched inappropriately or be swooped upon by Dundee SWAT in an unfortunate yet embarrassing misunderstanding. This meant that when my masseuse (even writing it seems dirty) failed to show on Monday I wasn't too upset. Still very sore. Eventually it was rearranged for Tuesday before work, and I was forced to face my fear. It turns out it was all very professional and above board. A strange process of enforced pain, and interesting chit chat, but I was a little surprised when I jumped/ 'fell with grace' off the table expecting to be healed completely. I was still sore. I said I was a Rational, not devoid of hope.

The next two days were spend with lots of discomfort and even more smirks and laughs from friends and colleagues. One person even told me "it gets better". When I asked him what gets better, he explained when he had his hips done "it only hurt for a week or so". 

I also ended up with a cold, something I can't really complain about considering how under prepared I was and how hard I pushed. Apparently this is fairly common for most first time runners, and I'd guess more common in those that didn't prepared as well as they should have.

You've probably gathered that I still haven't mentioned that first post marathon run. That's because I still haven't been. This is upsetting me greatly, but when I was sore it would have been stupid, when I had a cold it would have been naive. Now all I need to do is wait until I feel fit again. Then, get going. The benefit of this wait is that I still want to go running. I know a lot of people who completed a marathon and then didn't run for another year. I at least want to go out. This is made more encouraging by reading Susie Allisons book 'Scottish Trail Running'. A great read and hopefully I'll get out to try a few of these routes in the near future.

The mention of Lochaber in my last post still hasn't fully disappeared but I think I'll decide in November after a few weeks of relaxing running and after trying some of the local running clubs.

 That's all I've got for this post. Thanks to everyone for their encouragement and gentle mocking. Hopefully my next post will have actual, real life running at it's heart. 

(must think of a cool and ironic sign off)

1st post, 1st marathon

Not sure exactly how to start this blog except by saying; much like running I have had a few false starts into the world of blogging. I hope this blog will be used to talk about how my running, and racing is developing, Provide some support to other people attempting to run and prove to be a little cathartic for me.
For the last 12 weeks I have been training for the 2013 Baxters Loch Ness Marathon. Throughout the training I read and researched other people blogs and found them very encouraging and helpful, most notably the 'redwinerunner' race report. A blog I recommend anyone read by the way. So hopefully I am now adding to the collection for other runners.

I had initially thought that my training had gone well and that I was ready to give Loch Ness my best effort, and receive a 'just reward' for said efforts (go ahead laugh at my naive arrogance, it doesn't last long). As I work variable shifts of days and nights, with no set pattern I was reluctant to use a set plan. Instead, opting to use a rough plan doing increasingly long runs and then two other runs throughout the week. I would also cycle the couple of miles to and from work most days. The training was largely fun and enjoyable finding my times and fitness improving well. However I was struggling to fit all the runs in around, shifts and normal life. I found myself having extended periods of activity and then inactivity due to nights and then days off. but the long runs weren't too hard and my times were 'good' I thought. As the race came nearer I sought a little advice from friends that proved helpful, but my tapering wasn't ideal and then finally I got a slight cold the week of the race, though I did feel better on race day (nerves aside). See the excuses piling up already ;)

Below is my training log, I know now the flaws it shows. Mainly a lack of runs I was kidding myself that I was running enough, but it was made harder trying to plan while working shifts. But considering it was my first race I don't think it was too bad?

The race itself is a great experience, and very well run. There are a couple of things to know if you are entering though. 1. If you want to stay book accommodation well in advance. We used the marathon accommodation service and was very pleased with it. 2. You also need to register the night before, but that does allow you the chance to see some of Inverness, and is well worth it.

The night before we went to pizza express and I had some pasta but was a little disappointed it was a bit small (didn't they know I had a marathon to run). Then it was off to be bed for an early night. I'd had two beers the night before to help me relax and it must of work because I slept right through to 6am when my alarm went off. From then it was up, shower, dressed and breakfast. The breakfast was a little rushed so I only managed half my porridge but took a few muffins from the buffet and off I went. Inverness was very atmospheric with lots of low lying mist. When we got to the pick up at bought park it was very busy with lots of people busy preparing. One final toilet break and it was onto the bus for the hour and a half ride to the start. The actual bus ride wasn't great but it was scenic and I mostly tried to catch up on some sleep and eat a few snacks I'd brought with me, you can't beat jaffa cakes you know.

When we arrived it was about 9am and we had an hour to kill before the start. The start was in the middle of nowhere with some fabulous views of roaming country side. A scenic race indeed.I had a seat and layed down making a little nervous chit chat with some other runners and waiting until about just before the baggage lorry left before stripping down to race gear.

A fellow runner happily took a pre race photo

Then everything started. The hooter hooter and we were off. Slowly at first aiming to keep to a comfortable pace but still with a time in mind.....

 Now to digress to the time I had in mind. My predicted time they make you put in was 4:20 and was put in as a total guess. My long runs made me think that 4 hours was possible, though unlikely. However once I get something in my head its hard to shake. My 20 mile run in 3 hours did nothing to shatter this belief but I should of taken note of how sore I was at the end of that ONE 20 mile run.....

Back to the race. I managed to complete the first 6 miles (10km) in about 55 minutes and felt really good. As a lot of people have already said its mostly down hill and I was conscious of not going too fast or too slow on the down hills. There were was still a lot of people about at this point. there are a couple of small steep section but nothing too bad. From then I planned to run comfortably until mile 13 where I hoped I'd make it to in about 2 hours. I had figured that if I did it in two hours I could then just see what I had left and 'give it a go' for the second half. Yes i know!!!! Don't worry though, I soon learn. I did however get to 13miles in 2:01 feeling fairly good all things considered. I resolved to do one quicker mile and then pace myself to try and break the famous 4 hours.

This is where things began to unravel. I had taken a gel at mile 5 then again at mile 12 and my stomach was beginning to get annoyed . Nothing too serious but enough to make me question whether I should keep using them but other than that I was okay but as those middle miles went past the runners started to thin slightly and I tried to keep pushing on using other runners to leapfrog.

The course is still pretty flat at half way and winds along the loch with some stunning views and incredible support from the locals who were seemingly tireless in their encouragement. The marshalls and volunteers were also great and very encouraging. The support was one of the big positives of the race and the villages that the race passes through seem to have really taken on the race as their own.The other runners are all supportive as well and if I chatted to you and you're reading this I hope your race went well and you had fun.

At about mile 16 is where my 'inner demons'-I hate the term but it's all I've got; started to whisper in my ear. my pace started to slow slightly and I realised that 4 hours was off and I should focus on finishing. However my mind doesn't like to work that way (too many plucky Disney comeback stories) and I focused on 4:10 thinking if I could just maintain I would be okay. At this point i didn't want anymore gels and so just took sips of water and 'kept on trucking'. The goal time i kept setting was a really bad idea as I think as I tired I kept 'failing' or 'losing' as it slipped by.  Soon the famous hill came along and if I'm honest, mentally broke me. It isn't really that steep but is long and has a couple of false summits.  It was at this point the small mental battles started. First it was; don't go to the left as that's where the walkers go. Then, I was on the left as I didn't want to impede the runners overtaking me. Then, I just stopped running and walked. I'm not even sure if it was a conscious decision I just found myself walking. I was gutted that I had allowed myself to walk but I just couldn't run anymore I had had a thing about not walking as I wanted to 'run' the marathon. I'm still annoyed by it. From then on it was a case of running and walking while trying to fight myself to keep going. I tried to do run/walks, then I tried to cling onto someone and stay with them until a set point but my head was gone. I realise that this all probably sounds a bit over the top but I was broke. I stayed broke until I came into Inverness, running and walking. The time ticked by and it didn't seem slower, it just seemed longer. The reassuring mile markers of the 1st half were now cruel and further apart. It wasn't until mile 24 that I managed to regain some control and I told myself that I had to run (or shuffle) the last two miles without stopping. I know Anna would be there and I didn't want her to see me this beaten. The crowd support was amazing and despite what I must have looked like (the official photo has since proved it) the crowd kept shouting words of support and I was grateful for it. As the finish grew nearer I became oddly more emotional, it's something I normally avoid to the point of stubbornness. I could feel myself wanting to cry and I still don't fully understand why.

Then as I turned the final corner over the last bridge Anna popped into view, She ran with me and kept telling me how well I was doing. Her running with me really helped and give me something to keep going. But it did push me over the edge and I was now intermittently crying as I ran towards the finish line. I must have looked ridiculous. When the finish line did come I was so happy and elated but also so sore and deflated. I finished in 4:42:15 with the second 13 miles taking 2:41 minutes. Sometimes there is a misalignment between desire and ability. It was hard. When I met Anna I just broke down, I think it was the first time she had ever seen me cry. I felt happy to be finished, sad that I thought I'd let myself down, that I'd blown up, sad that I thought I'd lost. I don't know why I felt all these things but after some sleep and reflection; us nurses love reflection. I think It was exhaustion. I've never given as much physically or mentally, and the effects of it just left me open to that sort of emotion. Anna was great and somehow knew exactly what to say and do. I eventually managed to get myself together and after some small issues with losing Anna in the first aid tent we went in to warm up as I started to get chilled. we made our way back to the car and headed home to bonnie Dundee, via McDonald's of course.

In the car Anna and I chatted about her day and about the race. I spoke to my family and I started to feel more sane and put things in context. Getting those emotions back in the box buried deep down where they belong.

I know that this blog might sound horrific and a bit emo, for which I'm sorry. But that race taught me some harsh and valuable lessons about myself. In the future I need to be better prepared and not cut corners. I need to be more realistic and understanding about what the last 6 miles of a marathon are all about. I also need to train more and start from a better base level of fitness, which at least I now I have.

So I'm going to try and join a running club to try and get some more regular training. I'm also going to be a bit more realistic about times, and at least I now have something to beat.

If you are planning on running the Loch Ness Marathon, do it. It's a great event, well worth the big entry fee. Make a weekend of it and have fun. I'm sure you don't have as many 'running issues' as I do. Just make sure you train properly with some regular big runs that include some hills and make sure you leave enough for the last 6 miles.

If you're thinking of running a Marathon don't let this story put you off. With all the current emphasis on multi sports events and ultra distances events don't think that a Marathon isn't a big achievement. For every runner it is a test. I entered it thinking I could get a time, I didn't get anywhere near that time but I pushed myself to my limit and then Anna helped me find an extra mile. That's got to be worth something.



Please don't worry, my next posts will be much more fun and less of all this emotional nonsense.


Lochaber 2014 anyone?